Sunday, June 16, 2013

Nowhereland

I'm not a frequent flyer, and I don't hate airports. The last time I traveled was about a month ago, when I returned from a trip home. There was one particular stretch of 6 hours during that journey that I dreaded. The time between flights at the Frankfurt Airport in Germany.

I had landed early in the morning there, there was a small crowd, so my security check was done within 20 minutes. It was after the security check that I had to find a way to spend approximately 6 hours. And, when you're returning from a trip back home, oh that is a big deal.

In a confined space, in a country where not everyone understands what you speak, it can be tough to get around. I spent the first hour sitting at an airport cafe, with a view of the runways - looking at flights take off and land, wondering how far we have come since the invention of the airplane; about how such an amazing creation helped so many millions of people travel every day.

But, I could not sit at that cafe forever. It was a strange feeling - different times, different time zones, a messed up biological clock, the "almost headache" feeling, and nostalgia - a.k.a. the recipe for disaster!

Although I was wondering about all of mankind's amazing creations, there was a part of me that was second guessing my decisions in life. I could only think of what I was leaving behind at home. During those hours at the airport, I found myself not being able to live in the present.

It felt so strange. I found myself not only thinking about the trip I was returning from, but, all the decisions I had made earlier. I don't believe in duality - or the aspect of judging any action as good / bad - but, I found myself wondering if something I had done in the past was bad. There was an overwhelming negative emotion about those hours, that I could not avoid. I was leaving my comfort zone once more - my home, my family, my friends and it was my choice.

It took a while for me to come to terms with the fact that everything that I was doing had been due to my decisions, my choices. I usually write about choices and what not on this blog, but, it took me a while at that airport to come to terms with my own beliefs.

I am writing about this now because there will be times when we begin to question ourselves, our beliefs, our faith, and our choices. There will be times when we end up in such a nowhereland within our minds, where we are between everything that makes us feel home, and everything that defines us - our comfort zones. We might begin to second guess decisions, question many aspects of our lives.

Acceptance and gratitude help us through such times. Acceptance that the our past experiences had, in one way or another, been influenced by our own decisions / choices, and gratitude that irrespective of what had happened, we are still alive. And, an understanding that somewhere in this world, there are people who are struggling to get by every hour of every day. These build gratitude, and gratitude is central to all our lives - no matter what our philosophies are.

I'm thankful for being alive today, for being able to blog about my experiences, and live with a hope that someday, all of us can work towards building a better and a happy place for all of nature's creations.


    
Post a Comment